Jokers and his sisters
by takara410
Summary: was reading Crime doesnt take a vacation and thought of it hope you like it.Please read it and even tell me what you think even if you hate it.
1. Chapter 1

Okay I redit it and now tell me what you think if you want to re-read

Joker was sitting in his hideout while hearing screaming he sighed and yelled "girls!"

Twin brunettes came in that were both wearing matching black skirts and black shirts that said "Bite me". "Yes brother dearest they said sweetly he knew they did something but he ignored it though and got up "We are taking a little vacation so stop torturing my henchmen and pack!"

"But we weren't done" The twin on the left said with a pout "Yeah she's right bro" the other said sadly.

"Too bad I said were taking a vacation and that's it!"The one on the left rolled her eyes and looked at the clock "It's 3 in the morning who will take us because I don't want to die because of your "driving skills"."

Dopey was laughing a little bit and the joker dismissed his sisters and went to Dopey looking at him stalkingly "Something funny Dope?" he pooped the p in his name.

"No sir", he said looking at the Joker terrified

"Are you sure because it looks like it and being the person I am I love a good joke." He started laughing and got out his favorite knife.

The girls Bedroom

The twins were running around their room just throwing random things around in their suitcases. You could hear random shouts of they need this and they need that and just throwing things and jumping on suitcases to make them zip.

Joker walked in the door way and looked at his sisters "One question."

Shoot they both said "shoot".

"You both have never said one another's names in years and I can`t even remember your names so what are your names kiddo?"

They stopped in the middle of the room and looked at him "I can`t believe you forgot our names!"

He looked at them "You're lucky I at least remember you're my sisters I'll be back don`t leave."

Joker got in the van and drove to a dirty apartment building and made it to a certain door number. He started pounding his fists while shouting "Crane wake up! Wake up!"

After a couple of minutes Crane opened the door furious and noticed it was the Joker "What the hell"?

"No I'm your friend the Joker your best friend."

Crane laughed sarcastically "We were never friends and never will be friends!"

"So that's how come we have to start becoming friends!" He entered his house and started looking around the place .Crane still at the door "Sure come in I would love your company" Joker ignored the sarcastic tone.

He sat on his couch and looked at the Joker "What the hell are you doing here at he looked at his clock above the TV 3:30 am?"

"I am looking for something duh."

Crane pinched his nose tired "Ok what are you looking for?"

"Your keys" Joker said while shrugging his shoulders.

Crane still tired said "It's on my counter in the kitchen" he got up to go to his room.

Thanks Joker got the keys said nighty night closed the door and left. Crane looked at his blank TV screen "Wait my keys!" And he ran out the door yelling Joker.

"What Joker looked at him annoyed and he bit the inside of his left cheek.

"That's `s my keys! Joker what do you want with them?"

"Yes I know" and he continued to walk out to the cars. Crane walked in front of him and held his shoulders "What do you need with my car?" "

"Easy we are going on a vacation", he started skipping to the car and unlocked the car.

Crane looked at him puzzled "We who is we?" He hadn't seen Harley so he thought they weren`t together for now anyway. Joker looking at him knowing who he was thinking about "No My little sisters me Harvey, and you he said while getting in.

Crane looked at him shocked "Wait you have sisters" he asked now intrigued that the joker had sisters heck family even.

Joker sighed tiredly yes twins and he started the car now "Let's go"! Crane decided to go see these so called "sisters" since they will need his professional help, with a brother like that and he knew Joker would come back anyway and not be as nice.

During the drive Joker had went to a gas station and left for a few minutes and had came back with a slushie, some donuts and some started driving with his knees and he was munching on everything while drinkin his slushie he looked over towards Crane who was pressed the gas pedal when there was a red light and when he looked in the rearview mirror he laughed at the chaos he took out a sprinkle donut and held it towards Crane and asked if he wanted a bit but he shook his head no and was holding on his seat for his were driving towards the other side of town and he was bored so he turned on the radio and he was making gagging noises at every channel.

He found a rock channel and thehy were playing dissturbed and he was moving his head to the music and when he noticed that they were close he slamme dthe break and Crane hit the dashboard Joker got out of the car and waited for CVrane but thought he was going sighed and walked to his side pulled him out of the car and dragged him to the shitty apartment he had to hold tight to Crane since he was trying to get away.

There you go please tell me what you think


	2. Chapter 2

Crane had finally gotten the Joker to let him go and was now rubbing his sore forehead that probably had a bruise by now. When they finally gotten to the door it had the number six and Harvey's door had the same treatment as his Joker was just pounding on the door. "Hey Two- face it's me and Crane open up! Joker went against the door and said started running it and there were beginning to be dents in the door Joker was about to kick it down. "Dammit Joker I just got that new doorfroom your last visit" and you hear jangles and other locks and see Two- Face in pajamas as well as Crane looking at the two furiously. Joker just stirred in while looking around the place looking for something.

Two-Face looked at Crane sadly "So another crazy idea again?"

Crane nodded sadly "This time he is bringing his sisters into the mix."

Two-Face looked at him strangely while closing the door and looked at him weirdly "What did you say?"

Crane looked at him while they both sat at the table in the kitchen "You heard me the crazy dude has sisters."

Two-Face raised his good eyebrow "How many sisters does have?" while looking at Joker wondering why he was trashing the place.

Crane held up two fingers and saying "twins."

Two-Face looked at him with a smile on his face "Now this is getting interesting."

"Yes and he didn`t even tell me what they looked like, just that there twins and we are going on a forced vacation."Crane said tiredly

The two were now just talking about games of football, basketball and how Gotham is going to hell and politics. They were continuing their discussions until they noticed it was silent and they looked at one another and looked for where they last heard Joker. They found him on the bed lying on his stomach looking at some cell phone and is giggling.

Two-Face looked at the phone Joker was holding and lunged for the phone but Joker dodged out of his way, ran to the bathroom and locked the door. Two-Face was banging on the door yelling at the joker and was ignoring Crane saying it`s no use.

Crane looked at Two-Face "What is so important about the phone?"

Two-Face looked at him embarrassed "Look let's just say I still keep track of Rachel alright."

Crane was holding in a laugh "So what you mean to tell me is that you track Rachel by her phone."He could only nod in agreement.

"Look at the bright side no one will hear him or listen to him if he talks."Crane said while laughing and holding his shoulders. Two-Face looked at him and was looking at him a bit happier "Yeah I guess your right no one will listen to him."

Joker came out of the bathroom and he was laughing and he tossed Two-Face the phone while leaving the bedroom and grabbed Crane along with Two-Face. Joker had also grabbed a bag with him and was walking out of the room,when they had made it to the car Joker put that bag in the trunk. He pushed Two-Face in the back seat and Crane had already gone in Joker started driving with his knees and was eating his junk food again "What the hell Joker you sent this to Rachel!"

Joker laughed "Yes I did because I thought you two need to comunnicate more and share everything with one another!" He also laughed and pressed the gas button harder and all both men were holding on for dear three men hadlooked at the phone that was now ringing, Joker laughed even louder "Ohh someone`s seems upset."Two-Face ignored him and just looked at the phone as if it was death itself. Crane was laughing softly "Harvey would you like for me to answer for you?"Two- Face only shook his head no and just continues to stare at the phone and began shaking. Joker had finished his slushy and was getting bored now and he got tired of Harvey not having any balls and so he reached in the back seat and grabbed the phone rolled down the window and had thrown it out the window backed up and drove over the phone and drove off "Look there Harvey she won`t call you anymore."

When they finally made it back to the apartment neither of the two men were shocked that there was a number 13 on the door and had entered the place Joker had went in the back while the two men was just looking around the place.

"Twins where are you?"

"In here two!" girls shouted and the two came out one with a bloody kitchen knife and the other with a needle wearing a nurse outfit. Both the men now knew where he had gotten the dress.

The one in the nurse outfit had stepped up and took out her hand "Hello I`m Takara and she pointed to the other one she`s Rakara."

Rakara looked at the two up and down and looked at her brother "who are these two?"

Crane smiled and walked up to her and took out his hand "Hello I`m " and he smiled at her.

She looked at his hand repulsively "Doc you might want to take your hand back before I take it from you" and she smiled disturbed at him.

Crane smiled and quickly took his hand back and looked to Joker "Yep this one is definitely your sister" he started to circle Takara and he stopped and said "You look better than your brother does in that."

Takara laughed "You don`t know how hard it was to get it back into the shape it is now since he stretched it. Now are you ready for the big trip?"

"Well I wish I could say I am but someone grabbed me before I could grab any other clothes and things like that". He looked at the joker who was picking his teeth with a blood stained knife.

"Yeah he will do that but I`m pretty sure we'll find something now come on we need to gather all our stuff and hit the road."She walked towards the back towards a room and had came back with a black duffel bag and walked downstairs.

Crane looked at Joker and sat down in a reclining chair and looked at a sleeping Harvey Dent and looked to Joker "So where are we headed Joker?"

Joker stopped picking his teeth and looked at him "Where ever the wind takes us Toto" he got up and walked into the back as well and returned with something shiny behind his back. "Now I don`t trust you two alone sooooo" he got out the hand cuffs hit Crane with the end of the knife on the end and he passed out. Joker handcuffed him to the radiator and hand cuffed Two-Face to the same radiator and then too one another. He then left to go to his own room and pack his makeup along with his knives

there you go and I forgot to addf that Crane is in some blue scrubs and a white t-shirt got the idea from my Uncle


	3. Were Leaving

Joker and his sister's chp3

You will notice that in the story that I try to make the twins seem as if there one person and that`s what I am trying to do. I got the idea from the fabulous twins from Ouran high host club love them tell me if I did a good job or not.

Joker and the twins were having last minute things being put in the cars one of the twins looked over towards her unconscious guests. She kicked both of them but yet they were still asleep, so she got a sledge hammer and had grabbed their hair and put their head on the radiator and hit the radiator near the end. They both woke up and looked at the girl and were holding their heads in pain which was hard to do since they were chained together.

She smiled at them "Hello sunshine's the Earth says hello!"

They both looked up at the girl who was towering over them she uncuffed them and when they got up she threw them each a duffel bag "Hurry up and get dressed time for breakfast." She each told them where to go and get changed ,they complied since they were still groggy and were waking up but they made it to the rooms they were directed to.

Crane was directed to go to the room on the left when he opened the door he noticed how dirty it was in this room. There were clothes all over the place, bloodied up items, and even some body parts around. He saw the bathroom and headed right in he was thankful that the bathroom was clean. He then stripped down and had put the water on warm and stepped in. He was enjoying himself until he heard loud pounding on the door. He turned off the water and started drying off and he opened the bag and found his suit along with his shaver and other things. He put his bed clothes in the bag once he folded them and he stepped out of the bathroom. He saw that it was one of the twins which one he didn`t know. The twin was wearing a shirt that had happy bunny on it with a short gray jacket, with a black medium length skirt and was wearing black boots.

"Glad to see your out." She threw a weapon he didn`t even see carelessly onto the bed and walked out of the room. He followed her while taking his bag with him. They were heading back to the living room until they heard a manly scream knowing it was Harvey.

The twin had stopped and went to the door and yelled "Hurry up bro we don`t want to be late I got us reservations!"

Crane heard the door make unlocking noises and other things and he saw the joker in his suit with some fresh paint on with his hair and clothes slightly wet. He stepped out "See I`m already out". She rolled her eyes and grabbed keys to a car they all followed her. Crane was just about to ask her where is her sister until he saw she was watching something on Cartoonetwork. She grumbled and threw the remote which had hit the wall and was now stuck it looked.

"It`s not fair I want my old cartoons what happened to Freakazoid, Baby Looney Toons, Tiny Toons, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers!

The other twin rolled her eyes and sighed "Tiny Toons was on nick and so was animaniacs and Power Rangers was on Disney".

She looked at her sister and a knife was then thrown at her but she ducked in time.

She rose up and looked at her sister "Come on sis I want to eat before we hit the road."

The other twin is now all happy and jumps off the couch and she is wearing the same thing as her sister except that her mini jacket is black instead of gray. She got another set keys and they left guys heard the twins say not to screw up anything and not to touch the TV. When we made it to the garage we saw my car along with Harvey`s and Joker`s and we saw two cars that looks like it belongs in the Tokyo drift movie. The twins each went to the cars one twin went into a hot pink car that said sexy and the other went into the car that said naughty and was black they drove off. Harvey and Crane got stuck with the Joker and it seems that this weird family was having a race. Crane was so glad he didn`t eat anything turns out Joker can drive even crazier than last night. Every place they saw was a flashy blur of places, when we finally made it with each car banged up a bit the restaurant was at IHOP. Harvey and Crane were happy to be out of the car and ran to catch up with the twins. When they made it to the restaurant doors he asked the twins how Harvey was going to go out seeing as how he is. The girls just smiled saying that we shouldn`t worry and enjoy ourselves. We made it inside the restaurant and I held the door for a family and I notice it`s one of the crime families cousin. He smiles a thank you and I catch up to the others who have already been seated in a booth I sit with the twin wearing a black jacket and Harvey sits with the other one on her left and Joker is on her right.

When a server comes she looks at us and smiles and looked at the twins "Oh thank you two for that big large tip now I am able to get the apartment I wanted."

Both the twins smile "Hey you're our new friend and besides you're the only one we like."

The other twin nodded her head "She is right Stacy now how would you like to go with us on a vacation?"

She looked at the back looking at her boss "Hmm I don`t know I mean I still have to pack and move I mean I will be really busy and plus my boss actually wants me to work all my shifts."

"Oh come on we don`t want it to be an uneven number" the one on the left said while pouting and so did the other one.

She looked at the two and she then looked at Joker "I don`t want to intrude Mr. J on whatever you guys are doing."

Joker laughed really loud which made people look at them but the three ignored it. "Stacy you won`t intrude now come on and get us our food and eat with us we have to hit the road". Stacy looked at her boss and said fine took off her name tag and the little white sash that hides her tattoo and yelled for another server and they all ordered.

Some were eating the pancakes other were eating sausage or eggs. Joker was playing with the syrups by emptying them all on his pancakes and would pour the syrup on their pancakes and eggs for the twins.

Stacy had looked at her phone " You guys really do want to make it out early its eightish you guys don`t come here till nine or ten and you she pointed to Joker and you come near closing I thought something happened to you when you didn`t show."

Joker put a hand on his heart at least someone cares about me and then he jumped and was holding his foot. He looked at the twin across from him "What was that for!?"Then his other sister pinched him "Hey what is with the Joker abuse today!"

They both looked at him angrily you said at least someone cares about me we care. He half hugged the one close to him and kicked the other twin "Relax she is like friendly care your family care."They were b okay with that answer and they continued eating, once they were done The Joker had put down two hundred dollars and the twins put down also two hundred each and they all left. When they started walking out towards the cars Crane and Harvey saw the white van and saw the clown masks and wondered what`s going to happen next. They heard tapping of high heels they turned to see their waitress and she hugged the twins who froze instantly at the contact and the other twin stabbed her not too hard but for her to let go of them quickly.

"Thank you so much now I know why Stacy loves you guys you know what I'm also babysitter or whatever you need me to be."She said while jumping up and down. The twins laughed at her darkly and said "Oh please you're lucky we gave you that we were being generous and that it and don`t ever hug us or you`ll have to use that money to get fake arms and legs got it!" Her happiness was replaced by fear once again "yes Twins got it." They smiled and yelled great and they all turned to leave.

Stacy looked at Crane and the twin in the black Jacket and whispered "He`s a nice catch but he doesn`t seem your type of crazy."

The twin giggled and everyone looked at them but continued walking "He is not my boyfriend yet and two that is Jonathon Crane . Scarecrow."

Stacy rolled her eyes "Great so if you guys have kids then they will have multiple personality disorders and a weird cannibalism thing wonderful."

The twin looked at her and smiled "It is isn`t it and she laughed some more." They went in her car and Joker called everyone once they were in their cars.

"Ok everyone follow me and they followed him to a well known TV station. Once

the girls parked they looked at their brother weirdly "Hey bro what`s going on?"

The other girl asked the same question he just looked at him "Don`t worry we just are going to say a quick goodbye to Gotham before we go."The girls nodded their head okay we get it now and they followed him into the TV station. The goons were already there and had hostages Joker grabbed Stacy roughly and she looked at him frightened but he whispered something in her ear and she nodded her head and went to the camera. Crane just watched from afar and since Harvey decided to stay in the car he was alone.

"Hello Gotham I hope you liked that commercial now for more important matters." Joker shuffled threw the papers saying no and he threw all the stacks behind him. "Now Gotham I know you are watching me wondering what is it I am doing but you see me and all the other criminals are going on a little vacation." "Stacy show them who`s going on vacation" Stacy turned to see Crane who was in his suit looking down not paying attention then a shoe hit him in the chest and he looked at Joker angry "Come one Scarecrow say hello to the world" Stacy then turned back to Joker who was now with his sisters they were on the desk on their stomachs and Joker stood up and sat on the table Indian style.

Both the twins laid their head on his lap "Now I know what you're thinking but no they are my sisters this is Twin 1 and he pointed to the one on his left and Twin2, now Twin2 is not less than Twin 1 they are equal. Now before you start thinking naughty thoughts they are my sisters we don`t naughty things" The twins laughed and yelled incest. Joker patted their heads "Yes now with us going on vacation we need it I mean making this place my town I mean with no batman here it`s just boring so I will see you all later he waved bye and so did the twins and Stacy turned the camera off.

They all ran to the cars and left seeing the cop cars following them but they soon lost them and they were on the road.

* * *

There you go hope you like it and you should thank one special reviewer or else I wouldn`t have thought of writing another chapter so soon. I really hope you like it is four pages if I wrote another paragraph it would have been five. Now where do you think our gang should go I say Vegas and if you agree tell me what they should do if cops will track them,Will they meet fan girls; will it be like the hangover? Also wherever they end up I will need oc`s I might have to make some up but if you want to be one tell me your character, if they are girl ,boy, personality wise and if they will have fan girl moment and things like that. Email me if you want more than oneyou can limit is two once I'm done I'll give you the text and you tell me if I showed them correctly. Also they can have one night stands but I'm pretty sure if they do then there dead unless I can save them but it can`t be normal.


	4. Part 1

With Twin 1 it was just her in her car and Twin 2 it had her and Stacy the next car had the guys. In the front was Joker and on the sides was the girls and it was in a V shape. They all had their windows down and so you heard from one car "When worlds collide" another song was playing it was "My Immortal" piano version and Joker was singing both portions of the songs while Scarecrow and Two-Face tried to ignore the noise and the headaches that were forming.

Scarecrow was sitting in the passenger side holding his head in pain and tried counting to ten but did not work "Enough!" all car drivers had been shocked by his outburst and they had stopped driving and looked at the car and directly at Crane.

"What is wrong with you don`t you know not to distract the driver!"Joker yelled at Crane while trying to get back into his control of the twins had stopped behind them and had honked their horns and had cursed at them saying how he was a bad driver which he flipped them off and they kept on honking their horns.

Joker had pulled over and the girls had followed them and got out their car and once they did Twin 2 had went over to Joker side and Twin 1 went over to Crane and had started htting him

What the **Smack**

fuck is your **Hit**

problem are you** Smack**

Trying to kill us!? **Hit**

Crane had tried to block the blows but it did not help seeing as how Joker had began hitting him as well since he thought it would be fun,Crane had began kicking 2 had slid through the cars side and had began hitting her brother and sister.

"You guys stop it right now!"She yelled and had bit her brother`s right arm and had almost bit her sister`s had both stopped and some climbed out to hold their injuries and they began shouting to one did not notice Crane sneak out and go towards Stacy who had been standing non one side of the car.

He looked at her while she was watching the family of three "So are you used to this?" he pointed to the family.

She smiled and said "Yes it is normal it`s actually weird if they don`t start biting and hacking at one another."

He looked at her "So what`s with the twins and how do you know them?"

She laughed at this "Well it was really weird it was actually my first night working at IHOP and there weren`t alot of people there it was near closing time and well I saw the girls and they had said they wanted a booth and once I had shown them a booth I had told them what to order."

Okay that is the beginning please tell me what you think


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own anything at all sad to say

Stacy looked at crane " Before I tell you how I met them ;et me start by telling you that my real name is Rose but those three think that I am more of a Stacy then a when they get bored they crashed at my old place and thought that it was to small you see I was living in a studio so yeah so everytime those three came over they would complain about being cramped and how it was to small to trash or thow parties so they bought me a really nice place and I am moving their now."

Stacy cleared her throat "So how do you know them?"

Crane looked at her schocked "Do you no tknow who I am ?"

She chuckled "I know that you made some pollution that scaresthe hell out of people and it went all over Gotham city but thankfully I was out of town the week it happened but still how do you kno them?"

Crane readjusted himself and took a quick look at the family of three wore were fighting "Well I know Joker for only a short time the girl-

Twins Stacy said happily

Crane looked at her "Exscuse me?"

Stacy looked at him "They like to be called The only time they don`t dress the same is when they are meeting new people that will stick they make sure that person know which one they are talking to are try to get them to understand and also well becuase their twins."

Crane nodded at this information and then took a good look at her "You are not the type to agree easily to something like this or are you ?"

Stacy smiled a thank you at him "Well I`m not that type of person it`s just that I said no once to them and well I have one bad story and the scars to prove `t say no to them was the first lesson I learned from being with them.

Crane looked at the family who were in a circle and each of them had a knife and were making jabbing gestures towards one another while walking in a pointed towards them "Is this normal for them?"

Stacy looked at them sighed ,got off the car and walked towards them but not before turning back slighlty and with a smile replied " Sad but yes this is normal." She continued to walk towards the family until they saw her , they stood still and watched her but would keep an eye on their family members.

Stacy put her hands up "Okay guys why don`t we just get back in our cars and drive to where ever Mr.J wanted alright?"

The Twins and Joker looked at her and they put their knives away Joker had skipped to Stacy and said with a pout "But they both hit me and to make it even I should stab them."

Stacy put her hands on he rhips "J I don`t care now let`s get back into out cars and hit the road alright.

Joker put his head down in defeat but nodded and walked to his smiled and looked to the Twins "Is it alright if we start driving again?"

They nodded and went to their cars while Crane was already buckling up. They all stopped at what they were doing when they heard Harveys voice " Sorry I took so long thanks for waiting."

Joker got out of the car looked at him while moving his head alittle to the side "You were gone did anyone notice that he left?"

No the Twins shouted over their music

Neither Did I Crane said while opening a book about Psychology

Nope Stacy said while rolling up the windows and turning on the AC

Harvey was starting to cry while walking to the car and yelled "It`s nice to feal appreciated ya Jerks!" He got into the car and began to cry in the backseat.

Joker looked at him and patted him on the back "Hey that`s what best friends are for."

Crane stopped reading to look at Joker and to the sobbing half dead man in the back seat "I am not either of you guys friends I was just kid napped into thsi trip.

Joker looked at him while starting the engine "I thought there was an age limit for kidnappers." He sat still for a minute then shug his shoulder oh well and started driving with his sisters and "Stacy" behind him.

Tell me what you think

like it

love it

or

hate it

just tell me what you think

till next time my

friends


	6. Sorry Short

I DO NOT own

Joker was singing to the song "Don't Cha" loudly and painfully off key, to Cranes displeasure.

"Can we please listen to something else?" Crane asked pleasingly, while looking at Joker.

Joker stopped the car, tires screeching, Joker, Crane and Harvey all rushed forward.

"Change? From the Pussy cat Dolls your kidding right?" He said looking at Crane with a dead serious face.

Crane swallowed "Yes, I was joking okay." Joker got in his face, grabbed him by his shirt "I make the jokes around here got it?" After he said that he took out a knife.

Crane nodded his head slowly looking from Joker to the knife that was close to his lips. Joker got closer to him "You know The Twins would be crushed to see your face slashed, but on the other hand they do like a guy that has a story.".

Crane just sat still, breathing rapidly watching the Joker's movements. He soon relaxed when Joker had let him go, until Joker grabbed his head, slamming his head onto the glove compartment.

He kept on doing this until Crane had blacked out, before blacking out he felt warm droplets over his legs and a metallic smell as well. Harvey just stood still in the back seat,trying to be invisible. In his mind it worked but Joker knew he was their ,but he ignored him… for now.


End file.
